Ways to Be More Confident
Having a healthy level of self-confidence can significantly impact your personal and professional life. Research indicates that more confident individuals tend to achieve more academically and that your confidence level influences how you present yourself to others.
Fortunately, there are several ways to increase your self-confidence. Whether you lack confidence in one specific area or struggle to feel confident overall, these nine tips can help you boost your self-confidence.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Do you compare your appearance to people you follow on Instagram? Or do you compare your salary to what your friend earns? Social comparison theory suggests that making comparisons is natural but often detrimental to self-confidence.
A 2018 study in *Personality and Individual Differences* found a direct link between envy and self-esteem. When people compare themselves to others, they experience envy, which lowers their self-confidence.
To build self-confidence, recognize that comparisons are unhelpful. Everyone is on their own journey, and life isn’t a competition. If you feel envious, focus on your own strengths and successes. Keeping a gratitude journal can help you remember your blessings and focus on your own life.
"Social media is especially nefarious in this way," says Owens. "It is a system practically designed to foster comparison. But remembering that people generally only post the very best and the very worst of their experiences can help you celebrate your daily victories, which can boost your confidence."
Surround Yourself With Positive People
Reflect on how your friends make you feel. Do they uplift you or bring you down? Are they supportive or judgmental?
The people around you significantly influence your thoughts and attitudes about yourself. If you feel bad about yourself after spending time with someone, it might be time to distance yourself from them.
Instead, surround yourself with people who love and support you. Seek out positive individuals who can help build your confidence. Self-confidence and a positive attitude are closely linked.
Take Care of Your Body
It’s challenging to feel good about yourself if you’re not taking care of your body. Practicing self-care can boost your confidence as you know you’re doing something positive for your mind, body, and spirit.
Here are a few self-care practices linked to higher levels of self-confidence:
- Diet: Healthy eating leads to higher confidence and self-esteem. Nutrient-dense foods make you feel healthier, stronger, and more energized, improving your self-perception.
- Exercise: Regular physical activity boosts self-confidence. A 2016 study found that exercise improves body image, which in turn boosts confidence.
- Meditation: Meditation helps recognize and accept yourself, stopping negative self-talk and unhelpful mental chatter.
- Sleep: Good-quality sleep is linked with positive traits like optimism and self-esteem.
"Taking care of your body doesn't just mean looking good," explains Owens. "When you make yourself and your self-care a priority, you are projecting to the world that you matter—which convinces others to feel the same way about you."
Be Kind to Yourself
Self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness during mistakes, failures, or setbacks. This emotional flexibility enhances your connection to yourself and others.
A 2015 study links self-compassion with self-confidence. When facing challenges, recognize that imperfection is human. Navigate these experiences with compassion toward yourself.
Practice Positive Self-Talk
Negative self-talk limits your abilities and reduces self-confidence. Positive self-talk, however, fosters self-compassion, helps you overcome self-doubt, and encourages taking on new challenges.
When negative thoughts arise, challenge and reframe them into positive ones:
- "I can't handle this" becomes "I can do this."
- "I can't do anything right" becomes "I can do better next time."
- "I hate public speaking" becomes "I don't like public speaking" and "Everyone has strengths and weaknesses."
Face Your Fears
Don’t wait to feel more confident to tackle challenges. Facing your fears head-on builds confidence. If you're anxious or worried about making mistakes, try anyway. Even small victories contribute to confidence growth.
"This is, of course, easier said than done," says Owens. "But even small victories can help. Consider this a kind of exposure therapy - even a little progress is still progress!"
Do Things You're Good At
Engaging in activities you're good at boosts self-confidence. Your strengths become even stronger, enhancing your self-belief and life satisfaction.
Identify your strengths and engage with them regularly. If you're good at a sport, play it weekly. If you excel at a task at work, do it more often.
Know When to Say No
While engaging in strengths boosts confidence, recognize situations that lower it. If an activity consistently makes you feel worse, it’s okay to decline it.
Setting boundaries helps you feel safer and more in control. Confidence partly stems from feeling in control of your life.
Set Realistic Goals
Pursuing goals often involves failures, which can harm confidence. Set realistic goals that are achievable, boosting your confidence with each success.
To set realistic goals, write down your aspirations and assess their attainability. If a goal seems too lofty, adjust it to be more achievable.
This approach ensures that you achieve your goals, enhancing your confidence along the way.